"i want my marmie"

I remember about 20 years ago being really sick with hepatitis.  John was trying his best to get hold of the doctor, organise the children and be of help to me and all I could say to him was "Please just phone my mother and tell her to get her quickly".  She was the one I wanted before the doctor or the husband.

It goes back to childhood memories of having a temperature and sitting on my mom's lap with my head against her chest.  I can clearly remember how her voice sounded through her chest and what a comfort it was to be that close to her.  Also, when we were sick it was the only time that Dalene and I were allowed into her bed.  This "sick treat" was a big spoil for us and to this day I do not know why.  My mother is impossible to sleep next to.  She hates it if you move or tremble or twitch (or scratch your nose) and so you would be sick and have to lie there like a corpse and not move.  Yet that was the place we most wanted to be.

We have had some fun in our house this week.  Dalene has been helping out with Nic, as has Mike and Gareth but there are some things that only I am trusted to do for him.  I think because I was "trained" by the physio before he left the hospital on how to move the leg, it has become my job.  It is certainly not because I am more gentle or less clumsy than the others, in fact, quite the other way around.

Dalene now sits backs and laughs everytime we hear a "Maaarm...." from the bedroom.  9 times out of 10 it is as I sit down.  Not complaining at all but it got me thinking lots about being a mother, about how lucky I have been not to have had children who have been sick and about how, as a mother, you would rather take on the pain yourself than see your children distressed or in pain.  But, most of all, I have been thinking about how much I have been missing my mother over these last three weeks.

My mom is very much around, she is active and fit and is a very fortunate pensioner who, together with her husband, goes off on trips every couple of months.  They left for Norway about 6 weeks ago and did a cruise to see the Northern Lights.  They have just finished 3 weeks of barging in France and are now visiting friends in Copenhagen.  Usually they come and go and life carries on without any problems.  This trip however it has all been happening in Cape Town and while Dalene was in hospital we were undecided about whether to tell my mother or not. When her stay in hospital was not just for a couple of tests and ended up being for nearly a week, we emailed her to let her know. By this time,  Nic had also had his injury and his surgery was scheduled for the following week.  So as much as we did not want to spoil her holiday she needed to know and was informed of all that was happening.

Thank goodness everything is turning out alright.  Dalene is looking much better, Nic is much brighter and the pain is under control and best of all my mother is coming home on Wednesday.

"Maaarmie..............."

UK - 2005 - Family road trip