jennifer vs geraldine....

“But don’t forget who you really are. And I’m not talking about your so-called real name. All names are made up by someone else, even the one your parents gave you. You know who you really are. When you’re alone at night, looking up at the stars, or maybe lying in your bed in total darkness, you know that nameless person inside you…Your muscles will toughen. So will your heart and soul. That’s necessary for survival. But don’t lose touch with that person deep inside you, or else you won’t really have survived at all.” — Louis Sachar

Nice words for the weekend.  


Do you wish you had a different name?  Do you feel like your name really does belong to you?  I never used to feel close to my name, especially when I repeated it about 20 times in a row, it always sounded so strange (I was a strange kid).  I used to dream and play games in my head and always wanted to be called Geraldine. Weird.  My father had a younger cousin called Geraldine who lived in Kariba, Zimbabwe.  She came to Cape Town to study at UCT and lived with my grandmother (who lived over the road from us).  I was probably 10 years old at the time and Dalene and I spent a lot of time with my gran, so we saw a lot of Geraldine.  She was beautiful, had olive skin and the most beautiful smile. She played the guitar and was my hero.  I used to watch her getting dressed up to go out and she would put some of her very pale pink lipstick on my lips.  She wore a very musky perfume which she bought at the Hippie Market in town.  I loved her big earrings, bangles and hippy style dresses and shoes (like above).  I wanted to be her.  She was a free spirit with long, unruly hair (and I think she was a bit wild too as my grandmother had many sleepless nights during those years).  She graduated and moved on but always kept in touch with my grandmother.


When I travelled overseas on my own in 1980 to the UK, I looked her up and she invited me to come and stay for a couple of days (I had a parcel for her from my gran).  She had an Australian boyfriend and they managed a pub in London. A very dicey pub in an industrial area. I helped out for a couple of evenings but it was all men and rather rough so I had to head up to my room early as glasses got smashed and fights broke out.  


I was so looking forward to reuniting with her because she was always such fun and kind to me when I was young. However, after spending a couple of days with her my memories were shattered because she was pretty mean and nasty, she thought that I was keen on her boyfriend, she screamed and shouted at him and their staff and all in all it was a visit I wish I had not made.  I was homesick and being with her made me miss home even more. 


I made up a story and left 3 days earlier than planned and carried on my travels.


This was when I realised that people aren't always what you remembered them to be and that I did not want to be Geraldine anymore.  After all, Jennifer is a far nicer name than Geraldine.

i have this terrible habit...

of never finishing things.  I buy creams, potions, lotions and shampoos and get tired of them before the tube or bottle is finished.  Michael can happily use my discarded toothpaste tube for another week.  I get put off by the mushy look of what comes out of the tube and there is nothing nicer than a new tube of Aquafresh which has all its stripes in the right place.


The other evening I was looking for some Corenza C for Nic.  I started unpacking the medicine basket and once on a roll decided to give the cabinet in the bathroom a clear out as well.  Deary me.  It is not only face creams and body lotions that I never finish, it is also drugs and vitamins and homoeopathic stuff.  So many bottles that I am not sure when or why or for what I bought them. 

HoodiA Gordonii is some magic herbal potion.  I remember buying it at Clicks sometime last year.  It contains herbs that Bushmen eat off certain bushes that takes away their appetite.  Do you get fat bushmen?  It looks like I made a start on taking these tablets but why I stopped I do not know. Perhaps I was worried about developing more fat storage space in my bottom like bushman are inclined to do or perhaps it took away my thirst as well (I would hate to loose my appetite for liquid).   I remember from my junior school history that the Bushmen had to go for days without liquid and used to suck the liquid out of succulents.  Anyway, I am on a waste not want not drive and took two this morning.  Could be a problem as I am not feel thirsty yet and it is getting close to happy hour!!


Iron, we all know that iron is good for you.  Not sure why I don't take them anymore, so took one this morning.


Melatonin - this is a pretty good natural sleeping tablet.  Good for jet lag and for getting yourself back into a good sleeping routine.  Not sure why I did not finish the bottle.  I do remember reading that red wine has lots of melatonin in it.  It comes from the skins of the grapes.  You should drink red wine when you travel overseas by air.  I think I probably thought that a glass of red wine at bedtime would be better than a tablet.  Anyway I don't really drink red wine so perhaps I will take one of these Melatonin tablets tonight.


Taurine.  This I bought quite a few years ago.  It was at the time that I thought I was having a heart attack as I had a rapid pulse beating in my neck everytime I bent down or moved too quickly.  After my annual check-up it was discovered that my oestrogen levels were low, I was given a little plaster to put onto my hip every 4 days and from then on my heart has stopped beating in my neck.  Won't do me any harm, completely natural and I will take one tonight.

Arthro Guard -  This bottle has not been opened.  I think it came free with Spirulina (what a hoax that expensive little green pill was).  Michael and I took them religiously for a couple years - you could not just take one, the bottle said 8.  It had to be the brand by some German doctor and then there was something in the news that it was a total hoax and a few spinach leaves would be more beneficial to your health.  I do have a bit of a stiff shoulder at the moment. Perhaps one of these tomorrow morning?

Chromium Picolinate - Not really sure anymore about all the wonderful benefits of this natural chemical.  Perhaps it was when I thought I was diabetic and anorexic.  It seemed like a sensible tablet to take in case the symptoms got severe.  2 at bedtime tonight, 100% natural, can't do any harm.

Omega 3, 6 and 9.  Bonus - 90 capsules in this lovely clear yellow container and all three oils in one capsule.  I am pretty good at taking these but I heard that good old Cod Liver Oil is the best by far and I started taking 2 every evening forgetting about the 3,6 AND 9 in the fancy pancy container.  Must finish them before they expire.  1 soft-gel capsule tonight. 

Essentiale - liver tonic which I always buy at Christmas time.  I am a very lucky bunny never to suffer with hangovers so never really take them unless I have been a very silly bunny and had an Irish Coffee or two late at night after drinking wine and eating pizza.


Buchulife.  This was a freebie from Dalene.  She has a kind doctor friend who supplies her with free samples.  Natural gel vegi-caps.  These sounded very good for me and they were free so I popped a few.  Deary me, a couple of hours later I nearly phoned my friendly urologist on his cellphone to ask for immediate admission to Kingsbury Hospital with a chronically severe bladder infection.  The smell nearly made me pass out.  Anyone want 58 vegi-caps with buchu oil AND salmon oil that makes your urine smell worse than eating a whole can of asparagus and drinking the juice!!

Phytocor - also from the "heart attack" era.  Never opened.  Anyone for a natural cholesterol lowering supplement?  I only have 2 hands to hold all the capsules I will be taking over the next couple of weeks.


Free Spirulina - not the original German recipe.  Came free with Arthro Guard.  Anyone still believe in Spirulina?  Will check expiry date but you are welcome to it.  Spinach is also very cheap at Fruit and Veg at the moment.


Vitamin C and Zinc - A great combination.  The other vitamin I do believe in and insist that Michael takes every day.  I do take it when I feel a cold coming and now that winter is here I will start taking 1 tablet every morning again (from tomorrow).

This was from the medical basket, which is now nearly empty except for a box of Disprin, a bottle of Panada, Imodium (definitely expired but you don't want to get caught without it), band aid strips, Zambuk and Vicks Medinite.


Tomorrow will be the homoeopathic tablets that go under your tongue, all with strange numbers and combinations and the drops that also go under the tongue or in a small glass of water.  There is even a natural hormonal progesterone cream which you are supposed to rub on your wrists.  I did not notice any benefit but it is a wonderfully nourishing cream (made with macadamia nuts and avocado oil) which I have started using as a neck cream at night.  Can't do any harm? (I hope)


By the way I never found the Corenza C.

dysfunctional me....

sorry i have been quiet

no real reason

and sorry too for this form of writing for this post

but i quite enjoy writing like this for a change and

letting my thoughts ramble

(like they always do)

and thinking about where the best place to start a new line is, this is pretty important and needs quite a bit of thought because you don't want your words rambling on for too long so that your readers cannot take a breath

when it is soooo easy to press the enter button

every couple

of words

and you can make you point 

stand out

more clearly

sorry now i am apologising for being childish

and i am probably upsetting gareth and janet for

using lower case letters again

and no full stops 

but it is amazing how quickly you can get your thoughts

down when you don't have to bother about capitals

(well i can anyway)

i have also been a bit down on ideas of what to write about 

for the first time since starting this blog

(can it be writer's block?)

i hope it is writer's block

(oh my word, maybe it is.  maybe i am a writer?)

sorry

"stop apologizing, jennifer"

this last week has been one of those weeks which has had a bit 

of everything

good times with my boys all together

i love watching them together

three big guys on a couch, watching rugby

they are so gentle with each other

and matthew will play with gareth's hair

and nic will stroke matthew's back

and then pluck a few hairs off his neck

(which will lead to a quick thump on the upper arm)

it is very special for me to see

(the gentleness not the thump)

i also had some special times alone with matthew

before he left on monday morning

:(

i had lots of laughs with my sister

(who could start a business making chocolate vodka)

(it makes her giggle)

and dalene's giggle makes everyone happy

i so enjoy the blessing of being an aunt to her two great girls

who are growing up so fast

i had a couple of private laughs 

(and secrets) with amy

and loved watching kelly's emotional ride and excitement at making the hockey side

(so happy and chuffed with herself for being chosen 

but, at the same time, so sad for her friends that did not make the team)

she is a special child

(a bit too sensitive)

i told her to revel at being the best of the bunch

(it did not ever happen to me)

we had a lovely dinner with my mom and the boys on saturday night

(she too had not seen them together for ages)

and hayley and kathy were there too

we had steak, eggs and chips

(gareth will say "egg")

and we watched rugby (but not very seriously)

 and drank some wine (more seriously)

(and, not forgetting the chocolate vodka)

kathy is leaving tomorrow

(again)

 for a 6 week trip to america

(lucky fish)

but she does work very hard

(she says)

and i think of our friendship and how we have only 

swapped a couple of emails this week

not many

(she is busy)

(i am supposed to be)

but i have not seen her

and now i feel like i need to see her

(because 6 weeks is a very long time)

and she is off tomorrow

but we are having lunch before she leaves tomorrow

and i have been thinking

that it is strange that

while kathy is away our friendship changes a bit

and i find i email her for stupid things,

things that i would never even tell her about 

when she is around the corner

silly stuff

and how i have the need to make contact more often

when she is away

i remember how many years ago 

(when there were no cell phones)

and our boys were very young

we used to have these mammoth telephone conversations

one time gareth got collected by a friend's mom to go to a birthday party

and when he got dropped off 2 hours later

we were still on the phone

(same call)

we don't use the telephone anymore

bbm's and emails are the order of the day

and we don't have to see or speak to each other every day either

or even every week

because i know that she is close by

but now she is off

(lucky fish)

and i will miss her

but while she is away i can shop on amazon.com

and have stuff delivered to her hotel room

or her flat in williamstown

(very fancy)

amy is looking at catalogues for dresses 

for her grade 10 dance

and i will google williamstown and tell her which coffee shop

has almond croissants

(like she will not know)

and she will definitely bring me back a brugels bagel

and some honey and walnut creamed cheese

so i am off now

to have supper with my mommy and rob

and caroline is joining us

and i can hear about her travels

(and maybe drink some wine)

so cheers for now

this has been great for me to write these thoughts down

it is helped me put my finger on what i am feeling now

and i am feeling so mellow

because through it all i realise just how lucky i am

to have my family and my friends

and all of you to share things with

the good and the bad

and thank goodness there is always so much more good 

than bad

and saying goodbye can be sad

but it won't be for long

and there will  be reunions and dinners

and lovely nonsense emails in between

the writer's block is over

(don't think i ever had it)

have a great evening

and tomorrow is monday .... again!

A wonderful weekend is all but over but it was a great one with Matthew in town and family around.  Today was the most beautiful day in Cape Town and this afternoon while watching the Diamond Jubilee Celebrations and the gracious Queen on her feet for hours waving at the crowds on a really grey, raining and dismal summer day in London, I cannot help but think that there is nothing nicer than a sunny winter's day in Cape Town, and be thankful.


The weekend started off with watching Kelly play in the provincial zonal trials for hockey.  She played like a star and was the only Oakhurst girl to go through to the next round.  Amy's team bumbled through to a 0-0 draw but it was fun to watch and observe parents at a hockey match instead of a rugby match for a change.  It is all very foreign to me who knows nothing of hockey, the rules or tactics but I am learning.


The fandamily and some friends came around for rugby and steak, eggs and chips last night. Dalene outdid herself and made a huge decanter of chocolate vodka (served hot as a dessert) delicious and pretty potent. It was a great night with lots of laughs and the bonus of a win from the Stormers.  The announcement of the rugby team caused some unhappiness and stern words from the couch but today everyone seemed over it and in a good mood.  After all it was the most beautiful day.   Matthew and I headed off to Kalk Bay for breakfast and browsing. 

The best breakfast spot C'est La Vie is closed until mid July (I think that is what the sign said) so we found a spot at the french crepe place on the Main Road and had pancakes instead of breakfast.  Not a bad alternative and sitting right on the water was awesome.

The view from our seat.  A visit to Kalk Bay has to include a browse around the junk shops and I was surprised at how Matthew embraced the shopping experience. 

He bought himself a very old and vintage cutlery tray but had to find a home for all the old cutlery items that had been living the in the tray for years and years.  The closest container on the shelf was an enamel "pottie".  I was quite keen to buy the pottie for a pot plant but at R125-00, it did not seem like a bargain.  So it is now home to a collection of knives, forks and spoons.

We finished off the day with a "Tom Special" of perfectly charred lamb chops, rolls and cranberry salad (and the last of the Chocolate Vodka).  It was time for the brothers to say goodbye to each other (always makes me sad) and for the cousins to have their usual photograph with their "faraway cousin".

I now sit here finishing off this post, while Michael and Matthew watch Sunday night golf.  I am now wide awake as Tiger Woods is heading for a victory (I hope) as the 2 M's sit on the edge of their seats hoping for his demise.  Come on Tiger!!

Hockey star, Rugby star and Super star!!!

A new week is about to begin, starting off with goodbye's to Matt.  Not my best and not the best start to the week (followed by a visit to the dentist) but I am getting better at it.  We are planning a road trip to Kimberley during the Currie Cup and hopefully it won't be too long until he is home again.

Yeah Tiger.  South African or not, I can't like that Rory Sabatini (especially in that ridiculous cowboy hat).